Trust and Obey

It's already September... Like you need to be reminded...  I'm sure every store known to man has been buzzing with "back-to-school" campaigns for a good two months by now, NFL football is back (woot! woot!), and everyone and their mother is going caffeine-crazy to get their hands on a Pumpkin Spice Latte.

Man, when I was younger, the grown-ups always said silly things about how quickly time passes, when us kids knew better...we had an exact countdown to how many days till Christmas and it always felt forever away.

Well, I guess that qualifies me as being a grown-up now.

Not only is 2015 flying by, but when I begin to think about how this time 4 years ago I was preparing myself mentally, emotionally, and spiritually to leave my family, home, and land for the God I love, it hardly seems possible.

The twists and turns the Lord has taken me on since then were inconceivable.  But looking back, I can see now how God has taken me from strength to strength and faith to faith to where I am today.

To think, it all began when He sent me to live under the same roof as the missionary family I was sent to homeschool.  It was a blessing and relief to have this as security when I first moved here. Then three months out, quite literally, a mischief of rats herded me out of my one room apartment up the street to a place I could call my own for the next 10 months. I fulfilled my year assignment in homeschooling from that base and it was also there that I even got a taste of motherhood, caring for Mariflor while the Suchers were on furlough for two months.

When I was released from homeschooling, but not from the Dominican, God opened the door for me to walk alongside Cups of Cold Water with Mike and Terica Williams. Living just a stone's throw away from the village and children to whom I was ministering, the Lord brought me to a place of greater dependence than I knew before.  My Spanish began improving, my confidence began rising, and my cries unto the Lord began increasing....

Remember Lucas? My case in point.

Though I didn't ask God for a dog, I did cry out for protection, and His sense of humor never fails.  I really didn't want a dog (gee thanks, Mike) but I couldn't turn this puppy away.   I learned to care for another living creature everyday- chloroxing the house after his de-worming treatment, disciplining him after chewing up my shoes, training him to respond to commands, and learning deeper truths of forgiveness when he shred my beloved bible to pieces.

If that's not love, I don't know what is.

It was also there in Zion that God spoke powerful prophetic words over me in Isaiah 54 of His plans to give me more children than she who is married, and for me to lengthen my tent cords and strengthen my stakes in Him. There ended up being over 100 girls in my classes spread out among the 3 villages I was teaching in... The Lord most certainly was faithful to His words!

And I remember precisely the moment God told me He was my "cloud by day and fire by night" and to "get ready" because He was about to move...

I was scared out of my mind.  He had me lay it all down, and like with Job, I was given the promise that my latter days would be blessed more than my beginning... All I knew was to trust and obey.

As my Good Shepherd, He led me out of Zion into Sosua Abajo, where I have called home for over a year now.  Oh, the space for which I had been crying out! The bountiful breezes, surrounding peace, and abundant lawn for my four-legged friend to romp around chain-less!

I was completely on my own, no ground mission with whom I was affiliated anymore.  Yet knowing that I would need counsel, God brought alongside brothers and sisters in Christ, both here and abroad, who mentored and discipled me in this new chapter.

It was on a random car ride that I discovered Loma de los Chivos, and there's no doubt in my mind that the Spirit led me to the very spot that day where I now park my car every time I visit.  He revealed His next task for me and the only instruction I was given was to "go."  No matter how much I pleaded for more direction, He gave me no agenda other than this.

The Lord wasn't kidding when He said the best was yet to come...

God fulfilled my heart's desire of reading to children as He unfolded the truth of His love and purposes for the girls and boys through the storybook The Princess and the Kiss.  He strengthened my resolve to wait till marriage in light of revelation of His purposes of blood covenants.  He expanded my sphere of influence to that of the mothers and eventually the adolescents, as well.  

My heart could not even fathom all God had in store.

And who can forget the divine connection with Jennie Bishop, the author of the books I was reading to the girls and boys, and the founder of PurityWorks?!  Or the fulfillment of a Spirit-anointed vision of holding a royal ceremony for God's princesses and squires?

Oh, and let's talk about that dream God sent me just a week later that led me to accept an invitation to travel to Africa this summer.  The beauty of God's children in Tanzania both captured and rent my heart in new ways.

Can you imagine  for a moment with me what could have been had I refused to step out in faith at any point along the journey?

That is why, when God made it clear to me this time that my season in the DR has come to an end, I have had to cling to His faithfulness once more.

I admit, I have been struggling with this new reality as the past few months have been filled with deep mourning.  I knew this day was coming, but I couldn't have prepared myself for its weightiness.

With the heaviest of heart, I finally found the strength to share this truth with the girls in Loma de los Chivos.  I couldn't anticipate the sorrow that would be released that afternoon as I had to assure passers-by that no one had died, only that our mourning was in response to my soon departure.  It was possibly one of the saddest days of my life.   I can't even allow myself to think about it without hysterically breaking down in tears.

What God did in my "latter days" here has been more bountiful and beautiful than I could have imagined.  Life-long friendships have been forged, life-transforming biblical truths have been planted, and life-altering faith has once more been increased.

There still is not a day that goes by that I'm not weeping, so I ask for your prayers of comfort and discernment. One of the hardest decisions I'm having to face at the moment is what to do with my two closest friends.

There I go again... where are the tissues?

You know, I didn't ask God for these two, so how did they bury themselves so deep in my heart?  The Lord first sent me Lucas and then, when his separation anxiety made it difficult for me to leave the property, the Lord blessed us with Princesita.  Dogs need like-minded companionship just as much as we humans do.

I don't want to say goodbye, but if it's the Lord's will for me to do so, I want them to go to an affectionate home that will love, provide, and care for them.  Lord knows if there is a way for me to take them with me, I would in a heartbeat; however, not knowing for sure my future living situation,  I'm concerned that being constrained to the American life of chained walks and indoors would be difficult for these two when they've become so accustomed to roaming the land freely.  I also don't want to separate them as I know the main reason Princesita came to us was for Lucas.

Ultimately, I trust God and am asking Him to have His way in my life and theirs.  He has proven Himself faithful time and time again, and although weeping may tarry in the night, joy comes with the morning (Psalm 30:5).  God has shown me what He can do with our complete surrender.

I'm trying to value every moment with friends here and soak up every beauty the Dominican Republic has to offer.  I still must sort through what needs to be sold, donated, and discarded- some furniture, kitchenware, odds and ends, oh, and my car.

I'm looking at leaving the Dominican Republic within the next month or two as I await further confirmation to book my ticket back.  There's no reason to prolong my stay when I know the word has been given.  I know I can't leave without finalizing the selling of my car nor without peace in my heart concerning Lucas and Princesita... good grief, would someone just buy me a year supply of tissue boxes already?

So, what's next?  Funny how God works... I don't really know.  For now, upon my return, I'm hoping to travel a bit to speak and share in churches across the states that have faithfully supported me.  I'm viewing the coming months as a sort of furlough because I know whatever lies before me will be even greater still.

The Hymn "Trust and Obey" is playing on repeat in my heart, so I will leave you with its lyrics below.  Sometimes a song captures all we need to say.

When we walk with the Lord 

in the light of his word, 

what a glory he sheds on our way! 

While we do his good will, 

he abides with us still, 

and with all who will trust and obey.  

Refrain: 

Trust and obey, for there's no other way 

to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.  

Not a burden we bear, 

not a sorrow we share, 

but our toil he doth richly repay; 

not a grief or a loss, 

not a frown or a cross, 

but is blest if we trust and obey. 

(Refrain)  

But we never can prove 

the delights of his love 

until all on the altar we lay; 

for the favor he shows, 

for the joy he bestows, 

are for them who will trust and obey. 

(Refrain)  

Then in fellowship sweet 

we will sit at his feet, 

or we'll walk by his side in the way; 

what he says we will do, 

where he sends we will go; 

never fear, only trust and obey

(Refrain)