Do you remember this sweet face?
When I was serving with the Suchers back in 2012, they brought this beautiful little girl into their home and cared for her when her own family couldn't.
When the Suchers returned to the states on furlough from September-November 2012, I was one of three women who stepped in as "mom." Mariflor spent the weeknights with me, occasionally weekends, and the Lord taught me a great deal about motherhood during this time.
Bath and bedtime routines, soaking through diapers every night, throwing clothes pins on the floor to keep her occupied and out of my pantry cabinets, teaching her to root for the Baltimore Ravens, giving her the medicine her little body needed, and waking up at night to comfort her cries.
It was one of the most beautiful times in my life, but also, one of the hardest.
The Lord showed me how easy it is to love another's child as your own as He revealed His heart for the fatherless. He gave me a mother's love for this fearfully and wonderfully made child. However, I also recall praying, at sleep-deprived hours of the night, that the Lord wouldn't give me another child to care for as long as I was single... "next time, Lord, make sure I have a husband!"
Mariflor was stuck to my side, a permanent fixture on my leg whenever I went to the Suchers' house. When the Lord had me return to the states in February 2013, I knew I ran the chances that this almost 2 year-old child would forget me.
Sure enough, when I came back in July of the same year, she didn't remember me. Instead of running into my arms at the end of church on Sundays to fall asleep, she hid behind others.
One Sunday in particular, I couldn't even focus on worship because I heard her crying. I wanted so badly to run to her and hold her in my arms but I knew my attempts to comfort her would lead to no avail. Tears began streaming from my eyes as I could not hold the pain back any longer. I cried to the Lord in the middle of worship to heal my heart and He took me into a deeper chamber of His own as I heard Him say...
Since then, I have seen Mariflor in group settings, but it would never be the same. And I knew that was also necessary for what God had planned for everyone. At the time, He was giving me more daughters in Zion, Liberation, and Emmanuel, and I was called to be obedient in teaching them... besides, I asked God, "no kids till marriage," remember?
Just this week, I was invited to spend the morning with my Dominican family, Homero and Ester and their boys. I call them my "Dominican family" because that is who they became when Mariflor and I were on our own back in 2012. Now, they are Mariflor's Dominican family, as they've been raising her for the past 8 months as the Suchers have been away.
I was expecting to be greeted by the usual shy and timid Mariflor, but was surprised to find that she wouldn't stop talking! She is no longer a baby, but a bright, 3 year-old little girl, so full of spunk. As I sat in the kitchen visiting with Ester, Mariflor crawled up in my lap and hung off the side. She kept anxiously asking, "Tu vas?" Are you leaving? I reassured her that I would be eating lunch with them and that I wouldn't leave until later.
We watched scenes from Frozen together on the couch, and when she noticed how much hair I have, she promptly sat up and began playing with it. She found two white bags and put them on her hands like gloves and began "washing" my hair, and then tried her hand at braiding. It was like having the old Mariflor back.
For those three hours, we were once again inseparable. The most touching part was when she pleaded, "quiero ir contigo a tu casa"... I want to go with you to your house. I cannot even begin to tell you how these words nourished my soul. I told her she and her family can visit me soon.
I left that day with hope.
Not a hope that Mariflor could love and trust me again, but rather, a hope for the children for which God shared His grieving heart with me about last summer. God used this day with Mariflor to remind me that no one is past the point of returning to Him.
There is always hope.
We all have people in our lives who have fallen away from the Lord or rejected Him as their Savior. This grieves the Lord more than we can imagine, yet we know He waits patiently for their return.
Paul even wrote to Timothy that God "desires ALL people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth" (1 Timothy 2:4). As my pastor here repeats quite frequently, "All means ALL!" I believe that we're all predestined to spend eternity with Jesus, but He has given us free will, allowing us to choose to accept His free gift of salvation and turn from our ways or not. And being the all-knowing and sovereign God that He is, He already knows which children will return to Him.
Our world is hurting, people are lost, and only Jesus can save them.
I can only imagine the abundant joy that flows out from the throne room when God hears one of His wayward children cry in repentance, "I want to go with You to Your house!"
What can we do? Be examples of His love and pray. Pray for our friends and loved ones who don't know His saving love yet. The prayers of God's righteous people have great power as they are working (James 5:16) and I strongly believe God wants us to join Him in petitioning and praying on behalf of His creation. I think of the great intercessors in the Bible, like Moses, who beseeched the Lord not to destroy His stubborn children whom He delivered from Egypt... He still wants us to beseech Him today.
Mariflor is a product of such fervent prayer. She is a little girl with so much love to share and Lord only knows the plans He has for her. How awesome is our Lord?!
This is Mariflor.
When the Suchers returned to the states on furlough from September-November 2012, I was one of three women who stepped in as "mom." Mariflor spent the weeknights with me, occasionally weekends, and the Lord taught me a great deal about motherhood during this time.
Bath and bedtime routines, soaking through diapers every night, throwing clothes pins on the floor to keep her occupied and out of my pantry cabinets, teaching her to root for the Baltimore Ravens, giving her the medicine her little body needed, and waking up at night to comfort her cries.
It was one of the most beautiful times in my life, but also, one of the hardest.
The Lord showed me how easy it is to love another's child as your own as He revealed His heart for the fatherless. He gave me a mother's love for this fearfully and wonderfully made child. However, I also recall praying, at sleep-deprived hours of the night, that the Lord wouldn't give me another child to care for as long as I was single... "next time, Lord, make sure I have a husband!"
Mariflor was stuck to my side, a permanent fixture on my leg whenever I went to the Suchers' house. When the Lord had me return to the states in February 2013, I knew I ran the chances that this almost 2 year-old child would forget me.
The day before I left in February, Mariflor found a Sharpie marker
Sure enough, when I came back in July of the same year, she didn't remember me. Instead of running into my arms at the end of church on Sundays to fall asleep, she hid behind others.
One Sunday in particular, I couldn't even focus on worship because I heard her crying. I wanted so badly to run to her and hold her in my arms but I knew my attempts to comfort her would lead to no avail. Tears began streaming from my eyes as I could not hold the pain back any longer. I cried to the Lord in the middle of worship to heal my heart and He took me into a deeper chamber of His own as I heard Him say...
"Daughter, I know how you feel. So many of my beautiful children have turned away from me. Children who at one time clung to me, sought me in their distress, and delighted in my Presence, have fallen away. This grieves me beyond what you can imagine."I grieved with Him in that moment, but rejoiced in the revelation He had just given me. It was one of the most profound moments in my walk with the Lord. I would never trade the sorrow I experienced over losing Mariflor's trust and affection, because it drew me closer to God's own breaking heart.
Since then, I have seen Mariflor in group settings, but it would never be the same. And I knew that was also necessary for what God had planned for everyone. At the time, He was giving me more daughters in Zion, Liberation, and Emmanuel, and I was called to be obedient in teaching them... besides, I asked God, "no kids till marriage," remember?
Just this week, I was invited to spend the morning with my Dominican family, Homero and Ester and their boys. I call them my "Dominican family" because that is who they became when Mariflor and I were on our own back in 2012. Now, they are Mariflor's Dominican family, as they've been raising her for the past 8 months as the Suchers have been away.
I was expecting to be greeted by the usual shy and timid Mariflor, but was surprised to find that she wouldn't stop talking! She is no longer a baby, but a bright, 3 year-old little girl, so full of spunk. As I sat in the kitchen visiting with Ester, Mariflor crawled up in my lap and hung off the side. She kept anxiously asking, "Tu vas?" Are you leaving? I reassured her that I would be eating lunch with them and that I wouldn't leave until later.
We watched scenes from Frozen together on the couch, and when she noticed how much hair I have, she promptly sat up and began playing with it. She found two white bags and put them on her hands like gloves and began "washing" my hair, and then tried her hand at braiding. It was like having the old Mariflor back.
How's my hair?
For those three hours, we were once again inseparable. The most touching part was when she pleaded, "quiero ir contigo a tu casa"... I want to go with you to your house. I cannot even begin to tell you how these words nourished my soul. I told her she and her family can visit me soon.
I left that day with hope.
Not a hope that Mariflor could love and trust me again, but rather, a hope for the children for which God shared His grieving heart with me about last summer. God used this day with Mariflor to remind me that no one is past the point of returning to Him.
There is always hope.
We all have people in our lives who have fallen away from the Lord or rejected Him as their Savior. This grieves the Lord more than we can imagine, yet we know He waits patiently for their return.
"Therefore the LORD waits to be gracious to you, and therefore He exalts Himself to show mercy to you..." Isaiah 30:18
Paul even wrote to Timothy that God "desires ALL people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth" (1 Timothy 2:4). As my pastor here repeats quite frequently, "All means ALL!" I believe that we're all predestined to spend eternity with Jesus, but He has given us free will, allowing us to choose to accept His free gift of salvation and turn from our ways or not. And being the all-knowing and sovereign God that He is, He already knows which children will return to Him.
Our world is hurting, people are lost, and only Jesus can save them.
I can only imagine the abundant joy that flows out from the throne room when God hears one of His wayward children cry in repentance, "I want to go with You to Your house!"
What can we do? Be examples of His love and pray. Pray for our friends and loved ones who don't know His saving love yet. The prayers of God's righteous people have great power as they are working (James 5:16) and I strongly believe God wants us to join Him in petitioning and praying on behalf of His creation. I think of the great intercessors in the Bible, like Moses, who beseeched the Lord not to destroy His stubborn children whom He delivered from Egypt... He still wants us to beseech Him today.
Mariflor is a product of such fervent prayer. She is a little girl with so much love to share and Lord only knows the plans He has for her. How awesome is our Lord?!
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